Friday, May 2, 2014

Ain't Nobody Got Time for That

There are many things in life that we are suppose to do. Many of these we are suppose to do daily. Some for hygiene, some for mental or physical health... But if we were all being honest, we rarely do these things.


So let's get real....

1. Flossing.
Dentist: How often are you flossing?
You: "Oh you know... probably every other day. Which I'm sure is way better than most people."
Dentist: "Rightttt. Well let's just go over how it works again..."

2. Plucking your eyebrows. 
After every wax you are determined to keep up with the stray hairs so it doesn't get out of control again and make you wax it. 3 weeks later.. in the waxing chair.

3. Lotions. 
Whether it's bronzing lotion or cellulite reducer. Apply 3x daily? Bisch please. I put that on one time and then it's under a sink somewhere collecting dust.
Do me a favor. Go count how many Bath & Body Works gifted lotions you have in your "junk" bathroom cabinet. 37? That's what I thought.

4. Drinking 8 glasses of water a day. 
I drink water at work all day but I'm rarely near 8 glasses. An H20 binge never lasts.

5. Facial Toner.
Come on people. On a good day we cleanse and moisturize. No one tones. WTF is toning?

6. Exfoliating the rough spots on your feet.
Do it at home for pennies? Psh, no. I'll spend $40 for a pedicure every month.

7. Shaving your legs.
Boys, we do that every. single. day. 2 day stubble? Not on these legs!

8. Eat 2.5 cups of vegetables each day.
Let's be real.. there are nights when I think about what I ate that day and not ONE smidgen of an item resembled something that grew out of the earth.
Queso is a veggie, right?

9. 30 minutes of cardiovascular activity.
If only we were so lucky.
Or motivated.

10. Get 8 hours of sleep.
It's like a group of perfectionist-over-achievers got together and created the master list of "Things-You-Must-Do-Everyday-To-Be-Considered-A-Person-Who-Has-Their-Shit-Together" and made it impossible for us lazy normal people to achieve it all!

So, if you are someone who does these things every day, then congratulations. You deserve a "I have my shit together" medal.

For the rest of us ... well, there's always tomorrow. :)

#BackThatAzzUp Friday
(I think my fellow slackers will enjoy this song. It's my new jam.)


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  1. #1. your ad is live on september farm! #2. you're hysterical. i was nodding on every single one of these.

  2. Ummm... this post is everything I feel every single day. Are we the same person?
    PS. This jam is EVERYTHAAANG and I've got all of the time for it!

  3. Fancy is so hardcore. I promise I do floss often. My dentist even comments on it.


  4. Hey Kali!! Omg, so true!! I try to keep up but I cant! Love this post! Xx


  5. I used to tone all the time and now ehhh ... moisturiser and thats it. Good song choice :)

  6. I've been wondering what toning does for years. Half the time I barely remember to remove make up. And I was going to wear a skirt today, but then...shaving. Happy weekend!

  7. I Liebster'd you! Check it out!

  8. I get your point. We rarely focus on things, such as oral hygiene, because our lifestyles are always too busy to even consider stopping and flossing our teeth. Although I feel like this should change as cases of people with oral problems have been increasing recently. And what way to avoid it is to take care of our oral health.

    Javier Portocarrero @ Alluring Smiles

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